Looking for Revenge all Summer Sixteen

Wake Up after hittingsnooze button for 15th time (3)

It’s about that time of the year, where thousands of people get a gym membership because they are working on their summer body.  But let’s face reality here: Some of us are going to get a gym membership, go consistently for maybe two week, stop, and just let the gym that we got our membership at take out that monthly fee (luckily some gyms have a no commitment contract and you can get out of it at anytime) and then there are some of us who are really serious about this summer body, going to the gym at least three times a week and eating healthy.

I can’t really speak on this summer and having my body right and tight, because I’m inconsistent with the gym.  I’ll go for 5 days straight, take 7 days off, and eat horrible all 12 days, lol, but for summer of 2014, y’all really couldn’t tell me anything.  I worked my ass off to get my body the way that it was.  I practically lived in the gym, I worked out 5 days a week at the gym and the two days I wasn’t at the gym, I was at the local park doing my 4 miles.  I also was on herbalife (Which, btw I strongly recommend if you’re looking to seriously lose weight).

Working out and eating right seriously takes a lot of discipline.  If you don’t have discipline or don’t know how to get some discipline, it’ll be hard for you to reach your goal, even if you do start in January.  Losing weight or getting the body goals that you desire is about 80% eating and 20% gym.  That’s my problem now for trying to get my body right.  I eat WHATEVER, WHENEVER, HOWEVER, BUT I surely can get my ass into the gym and workout for 2 to 3 hours with no problem.

Any way, if you plan on having that bomb summer body, get a gym membership and actually go at least 3 days a week and incorporate it with a healthy eating lifestyle (not a diet, because diets don’t work and they’re only temporary until you slip back into your old ways).

-xoxo

Jas ❤

How to Handle Moving Back in With Your Parents

Like most people, when we were young we always said, “I can’t wait until I turn 18 so I can move out.” We mainly said that because our parents did something to piss us off, not knowing that one day we might actually regret the day that we leave our parents’ house.

When most people leave, it’s because they are going off to college or off to basic training.  If you’re like me, I spent my first two years of college living in the dorm room, so I was kind of on my own, but I kind of wasn’t and my last two years of college, I got an apartment with my two best friends and I was really on my own then.  When I graduated I had plans of moving to Nashville, but reality hit that I couldn’t financially afford moving to Nashville especially with the pay of the jobs that I had gotten in Nashville.  The next best thing for me to do was to move back home with parents.

When I say that moving back home is probably one of the hardest things you could ever do, it is one of the hardest things you could ever do.  You get so used to living on your own and doing things your way, but when you move back home, you have to follow by your parents rules and do as they say.  One of the things I struggled with and still struggle with is letting my parents know my every move.  Whenever I leave the house, my parents want to know where I’m going.  If I get off work and decide to not go home right away, my parents want to know where I’m going.  When I go out on a date, they want to know the guy’s name, kind of car he drives, what he looks like, social security number, who he dated when he was 12, etc.  It’s just difficult because I never had to do all of those things when I was on my own.  I may have told my roommates, like hey, “I have a date with so and so and we’re going to such and such,” but most times that was by choice.  They didn’t force that out of me or get mad if I didn’t tell them.

While living with my two roommates, we had an every man for himself motto.  We all both our own food, cleaning supplies, laundry detergent, cleaned our own dishes; heck we even paid our own rent, lol.  She you can imagine if I have had that mentality for the past two years, when I moved back home it still stuck with me.  My mom wouldn’t necessarily get angry or say anything at the moment, but later on after the fact she would throw in my face how I only buy food for me and that only I eat instead of buying food for the entire household.  She would also complain about me not cleaning the dishes (because lord knows I’m not about to lay a finger on those dishes if I haven’t even stepped into the kitchen for a good week).

Oh, and let’s not forget the day my mom asked me for $25 a month to help pay for laundry detergent and tissue.  I think I about lost my mind when she asked for a simple, TWENTY-FIVE dollars, y’all.  I was like girl this is your house, not mine, you provide all of that for yourself, but then I had a coming to jesus moment and realized how selfish of me that was to even get mad at her for asking me for $25 a month.  Lol, I was like man I rather pay $25 a month as opposed to $400 plus a month for rent and besides I did have to wash and I use more tissue than most people change their underwear, lol.  Needless to say pitching in a little month here and there and or picking up some milk and orange juice when you see there is none in the refrigerator isn’t as bad as you think.

A good mindset to have when moving back in with your parents is moving in with a plan to move out.  If you have a plan set in motion, the more likely and sooner you are to move back out of your parents’ home.  As I was moping and sad while packing up my apartment and loading the boxes into my car thinking about how I was really about to move back in with parents, I also thought about how this is only temporary.  I had plans of only moving back home for a year and getting the heck of there.  It hasn’t been a full year yet, but honey best believe come August of 2016, I’ll be riding back and forth from my parents’ house to my new apartment in a U-Haul truck.

The main keys to success (in my best DJ Khaled voice) when moving back in with your parents are to:

  1. Give yourself a Time Limit
    1. Realize that this is a minor setback for a major comeback
  2. Contribute
    1. Pitch in a couple bucks once a month for groceries and/or anything else needed for the house
  3. Respect their Home
    1. Abide by their rules, but also set some rules for yourself that you both can agree on

-xoxo

Jas ❤

“Umm, why are you trying to talk to me?”

The other day, I was on Instagram and I was reading this guys post about how he was at the laundry mat and this lady left her wallet there.  He went after her to try to give it to her, but instead she was all, “I have a man, leave me alone.” He called after her again, but this time instead of saying something back to him, she just hopped in her car and drove off.  About 10 minutes later, she came back looking for her wallet.  Once more, he tried to give it to her, and well of course, she went off again saying, “I have a man get the *bleep* out my face.” He finally just handed the lady her wallet and walked away.  Once she realized why he was trying to talk to her, she tried to apologize, but by then he didn’t want to hear anything she had to say and told her to save her apology.

As women, why do we always automatically assume that just because a guy is trying to have a conversation with us, that he is trying to pursue us? I mean I myself have done it before, especially when I’m by myself and a man approaches me.  I remember I was at the Opry Mall, and a guy came up to me and asked how old I was.  I immediately thought it was trying to get at me, and I replied, “If you have to ask, then that means I’m too young for you.” And he replied, “Umm, I just wanted to know how you were because there’s still party going on tonight and I wanted to invite you but you have to be a certain age,” as he handed me a flyer.  Talk about embarrassing, lol.

It’s crazy, because the guy could genuinely just want to have a conversation with you.  He could be approaching you because he liked your style and thought it was similar to his girlfriend or wife and wanted your advice on what to get his significant other.  I don’t know if it’s because we think so highly of ourselves or if we are just quite clueless when it comes to guys and their approach.  We tend to mistake a friendly conversation for a romantic interest.  If I had a dollar for every time, a friend of mine has said, “He wants me, I know it.” just because he glanced at her or had a conversation with her, I would probably be a millionaire by now.  We also tend to call a guy “thirsty” just because he is trying to have a friendly conversation when most times that’s not even the case.

I have challenged myself to not assume that all guys are trying to talk to me when they approach me.  I always go along with the flow of the conversation, because typically, they don’t right off the bat come out and say anything about trying to “holler” at you.  It’s a casual conversation to see if you’re a cool chick and then it’s followed by a can I have your number or are you single.

BUT I said all of this just to say, don’t get me wrong, I would say about a good 60% of the time, that’s generally what a guy is doing when they are approaching you.  Trying to “holler.” You just have to just like I said go with the flow and not assume that, that is what they are doing, unless you don’t care and want to be rude like the lady I mentioned beforehand and possibly lose out on $800 (which is the amount of cash she had in her wallet that, that young man could have taken).

-xoxo

Jas ❤

But Wearing Weave is A lot Less Maintenance than Wearing my Fro Out!

This is the excerpt for your very first post.

If you’re anything like me, you prefer wearing protective styles 365 and in a leap year, 366 days a year (with the exception of the day or two that you were your natural hair out because you couldn’t set an appointment the day of or day after you took your previous protective style down).  Recently, I took my weave out and instead of instantly getting another protective style, I have decided to let my scalp breathe for a couple of weeks, maybe a month or two and honey… let me tell you.

After I shampooed, deep-conditioned, trimmed, dyed, moisturized, and two-strand twisted my hair, I was seriously thinking about either cutting it all off, because my theory is the shorter the natural hair, the easier to maintain, the longer the natural hair, the harder, or going to the beauty supply store and buying some braiding hair and slapping some braids right into my head.

Don’t get me wrong, I love my natural hair and kudos to those who wear there natural hair out all the time, but however, I love my protective styles.  They are so easy to maintain and most of the times all I have to do is put a bonnet on, sleep, wake-up, take the bonnet off, and go.  But chile, let me try that with this natural hair and I’ll be looking like boo-foo the fool.  Lol.

I will say though, for me the natural process has been an up and down battle.  I first decided to go natural and do the “big chop” in August of 2012.  My hair was so damaged and I just couldn’t take it anymore.  I walked into the beauty salon and straight up told my beautician to just chop all this shit off, with no hesitation.

It was honestly, a battle with myself.  I lost a lot of self-esteem because I did not embrace my short hair like I wish I would have.  I was used to being the pretty chick with long hair and I felt like the ugly chick with short hair that looks like a man (I kid you not, I’d gotten mistake for a man several times, which is why I now wear make-up and big earrings now when I’m wearing my natural hair).  And once my hair grew long enough for me to slap some weave in, you better believe I slapped some weave in and I didn’t stop slapping weave in until I damaged my hair yet again and had to cut it all off again.

This time around, I took better care of my hair by researching and researching how to actively take care of my natural hair when I wore it out and when I work protective styles.  I still haven’t learned my lesson when it comes to heat on my hair because I consistently use that flat iron when I have leave out on a sew-in.

My hair is now longer than what it was been since I’ve gone natural back in 2012, hence the picture.  I can finally put this bad boy in a ponytail honey and I swear y’all can’t tell me shit because I can lol.

Any how, below I have listed some of the natural hair products that I use on a daily basis:

Lotta Body Moisturize Me

Lotta Body Shape Me

Organix Coconut Milk Shampoo & Conditioner

Organix Bioin & Collagen Conditioner

Organix Argan Oil & Morocco Conditioner

Shea Moisture Raw Shea Butter Moisture Retention Shampoo & Conditioner

I honestly don’t have a favorite brand of conditioner and/or shampoo, I just choose which ever one, I want to use that day that I wash my hair.

-xoxo

Jas ❤

I’ve graduated college, now what?

This is the excerpt for your very first post.

Did you recently graduate and now don’t know what’s next in life? When I first started my freshmen year at Western Kentucky University, I had my life all planned out for once I graduated.  I was majoring in Fashion Merchandising with a minor in Marketing.  I had plans of moving to either Los Angeles or New York City and becoming this big fashion industry person being a stylist.  During my junior year, my dreams of becoming a stylist soon shattered as I realized it was an extremely hard job industry to break into.  I then decided that I was still going to move to either of those cities, I was just going to become an assistant buyer or visual merchandiser.

Reality hit once that Monday after I walked the stage came.  I had landed a full-time job, paying $8.50 an hour.  Like wait what? Is this really a wage that I was supposed to survive off of? I mainly took the job because I had one class left to complete before I officially graduated, and that was an internship course.  After my first day on the job, I got a bad vibe and didn’t enjoy myself and I never showed back up after.  Then I was out struggling again to find another job in retail to take my care of my internship class I needed.  And then New York and Company called me.  They were only paying me $7.60 an hour.  And then Shoe Sensation and that was only $7.25 an hour.  I thought, man this is not the life I wanted.  Everyone else around me were either finding a job in their field starting out making $35,000 and/or off to graduate school.  I felt lost and like I was heading nowhere in life.  I felt like a big failure and that my degree was going to be a complete waste, especially after I finally got a job that was decent pay, $10.00 at Afni, a call center.

I had taken a year off from going back to school to get my life together and decide exactly what it is in life that I wanted to do.  My plans were to move back home, get a job, get my money right, study and take the GRE, and then apply to schools.  Although I had this plan set, I still felt like I was going nowhere in life.  I had a Bachelor’s degree and I was working two jobs, University of Memphis Bookstore making $8.00 an hour and at JCPenney’s making $8.50 an hour.  If I wanted to move out of my parents’ home, because lord knows that they urked my nerves, I couldn’t even do that.  I was barely getting 20 hours a week at both jobs combined.

 Here I am, 8 months after I graduated and am finally working a Full-Time salaried job, but to be completely honest, I don’t hate the job, but it’s not something I see myself doing for the rest of my life.  I don’t want a 9-5, desk job, making 90-100 outbound calls a day.  I guess you can say it’s been hitting me hard here lately, that I am actually not in New York or Los Angeles being the best Assistant Buyer that I know I have the full potential to be.  I took a year off from graduate school to figure out my life and what I want to do and I still feel like I haven’t done that.  I’m still struggling to find out what my reason for being here is, to find out what I will enjoy waking up every morning doing, and what I can see myself doing for the rest of my life.

It’s definitely been an uphill battle, but I know that it’s nothing that I can’t figure out. So sit back, relax, don’t stress, and do what you have to do to get where you need to be.

-xoxo

Jas ❤

First blog post

This is the excerpt for your very first post.

Welcome to Perilous Woman.  I have been working on this blog for quite some time now and am finally glad to have the ball running on everything.  I previously had a blog known as Fashion Frog Boulevard that was all about fashion.  With this blog, I wanted something different.  I wanted a blog where I am able to express my thoughts on all topics from fashion, relationships, entertainment, beauty, to lifestyle.  I didn’t want to limit myself to just one topic and that’s how I came up with this here blog.  I hope you all enjoy the content and see my passion through my writing.

A little about me:

My name is Jasmine and I am from Memphis, TN.  I am a graduate of Western Kentucky University with a BS in Fashion Merchandising.  Right now, I am currently trying to figure out my life and what exactly it is that I want to do in life.  Some days I want to go to grad school for communication, some days I want to go for higher education, and other days I just want to become a stripper.  I am an extroverted introvert who enjoys reading, writing, and drawing on some days and twerking, drinking, and hanging out on other days.

Follow my personal and Perilous Woman social medias:

IG: @gawwwjas / @perilouswoman

Twitter: @gawwwjas / @perilouswoman

Snapchat: jhockaday1908

-xoxo

Jas ❤